Dark Souls General

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Dark Souls General

Post by Xandy on Fri Feb 03, 2012 2:24 am

How should I go about preparing my anus?


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Re: Dark Souls General

Post by Furburt on Fri Feb 03, 2012 2:28 am

Your journey will begin because YOU DIED. You'll run out of your cell and then YOU'LL DIE. You'll pause to grab your breath and die another gruesome death, and you'll creep around each corner terrified.

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Re: Dark Souls General

Post by Walnutman on Fri Feb 03, 2012 3:00 pm

My copy of Dark souls arrived in the mail today, just about to start, what a coincidence!

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Re: Dark Souls General

Post by LordCuthberton on Mon Feb 06, 2012 11:22 am

Furburt wrote:Your journey will begin because YOU DIED. You'll run out of your cell and then YOU'LL DIE. You'll pause to grab your breath and die another gruesome death, and you'll creep around each corner terrified.

HEY LOOK A GRAVEYARD TO EXPLO-


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Re: Dark Souls General

Post by Xandy on Mon Feb 06, 2012 1:29 pm

Played it for about two hours so far.

I don't think I've ever died ten times on the tutorial level of a game before.


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Re: Dark Souls General

Post by MilkyFresh on Mon Feb 06, 2012 1:55 pm

Been meaning to check out Demon's Souls forever. May as well try this.

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Re: Dark Souls General

Post by Xandy on Sun Feb 12, 2012 2:50 am

Aside from the bosses and some of the tougher enemies, this game actually isn't all that hard. Addictive as fuck too.

Also, I love how the only way to beat the bosses half the time is to fight dirty/abuse the hell out of exploits.

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Re: Dark Souls General

Post by Xandy on Sun Feb 12, 2012 3:43 pm

FUCK YOU CAPRA AND FUCK YOUR FUCKING DOGS

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Re: Dark Souls General

Post by Hubilub on Sun Feb 12, 2012 4:04 pm

Is Civ 5 actually any good?

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Re: Dark Souls General

Post by Hubilub on Sun Feb 12, 2012 4:10 pm

WAIT THIS IS THE WRONG THREAD

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Re: Dark Souls General

Post by Xandy on Mon Feb 13, 2012 3:48 pm

>become a phantom and help noobs defeat bosses
>get lots of souls and humanity for assisting them
>feelsgoodman.jpg
>find out I can join the Sunlight Warriors covenant if I've helped enough players out
>go talk to Sunbro altar in Undead Burg, lets me join his covenant
>get lightning spears

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Re: Dark Souls General

Post by Xandy on Tue Feb 14, 2012 2:58 pm

I fucking love this game.

To hell with Skyrim, Dark Souls is where the real shit is at.

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Re: Dark Souls General

Post by Xandy on Sat Feb 18, 2012 11:25 pm

>dat feel when you defeat a major boss in your first battle with them

:hitler:

Also, my pyromancer now looks like a nazgul. Which is awesome.

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Re: Dark Souls General

Post by LordCuthberton on Mon Mar 05, 2012 6:32 pm

Xandy, getting Dark Souls in the post this week.

General tips? Rundown of classes and shit? HALP IT LOOKS HARD FOR MAINSTREAM CUTHY

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Re: Dark Souls General

Post by Hubilub on Mon Mar 05, 2012 6:42 pm

General tip:

Prepare your anus

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Re: Dark Souls General

Post by LordCuthberton on Mon Mar 05, 2012 6:45 pm

Buttfucking is more likely if I go in as blind as a Western shooter/RPG/Mainstream/TBS/Stealth video game fan.

Like, I have never played a proper JRPG. I've played a Final Fantasy for 1 minute and Pokemon. That's all. I will need a tad bit of tutoring!

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Re: Dark Souls General

Post by Xandy on Mon Mar 05, 2012 8:44 pm

For a first playthrough the class you want to get is Pyromancer. You get to be level one which allows for more customization, you have access to fireballs and you get a very good set of starting armour.

Take master key as your gift. Everything else is shit.

For stats you will always want to put points into Vitality/Endurance (which increase health and stamina). Strength/Dexterity will increase damage with weapons with weapons that scale with them (katanas and spear scale with Dex, clubs and greataxes scale with Str etc.) but don't get exceptional after 20 points in them. Intelligence and Faith scale better and are therefore better to dump points in as you get higher level, plus let you use cool spells. Resistance is shit tier stat. Attunment increases the amount of spell slots you have.

The game will be difficult and frustrating at first, but that's mostly just because it plays differently from other games. Eventually you will adjust to the gameplay and be able to waltz through Undead Burg with ease. Then it gets worse.

If you keep dying at a certain section/boss, look up some videos on YouTube or go onto one of the two Dark Sousl wikis for help,

Kindling is permanent and even carries on to future games. If you have the humanity to kindle, do so.

Heavy armour can be useful but only if you doesn't slow you down too much. You need to be able to roll and dodge properly to survive. Putting points into endurance or getting Havel's Ring can decrease the effect of armour weight.

LIGHTNING RAPES EVERYTHING but isn't as good at very high levels since it can't scale with stats.

Claymore is best high-level sword. Get it as soon as you can and ascend it with whatever effects bests suit you later on. In the meantime use the Drake Sword.

Get a bow, any bow, and as many cheap wooden arrows as you can.

Sunbros are best bros. Praise the sun!

GET THE MASTER KEY AS GIFT. This will make your life much easier when you need to go to lower bell. You can (if you want, I would not advise it) skip two entire boss battles and skip through half of Blightown (possibly the most annoying area in the game) by going to New Londo, opening a passage to the Valley of Drakes with the key, and then entering a cave leading to Blighttown past all the cannibals and half the blowdart niggers.

If you're going to fight a boss soon, get into human form and try and get a phantom to assist you. Having other players will help you greatly.

Solaire will help you with the following boss fights - Gargoyles, Gaping Dragon, Ornstein/Smough and the Centipdede Demon. Look for his summon sign outside the boss areas and team up for jolly co-operation.

Remember the five D's of Dark Souls - Dodge, Duck, Dip, Dive and Dodge!

Do not attack any NPCs (except Lautrec, the cunt) unless you want them to hate you forever. In which case you must go to the bishop Oswald and pay an ABSURD amount of souls to get forgiveness.

Oswald is one guy in this game you REALLY do not want to piss off. He's the only character who can offer absolution for attacking NPCs or breaking allegiances to covenants. He also offers some cool items and can let you abandon a covenant without pissing said covenant off.

Kill Lautrec as soon as possible. Kill him as soon as you let him out of his cell. Cut his arm off and shove that shotel of his up his ass. You will thank me for this later.

Never attack blacksmiths.

Sen's Fortress will be your fucking bane.

Anor Londo, the area immediately after Sen's Fortress, is somehow even worse.

There's a general rule about handling encounters with black knights, that being GET THE FUCK OUT OF THERE.

PRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAISE THE SUUUUUUUUUUUUN

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Re: Dark Souls General

Post by MilkyFresh on Mon Mar 05, 2012 8:53 pm

I'll probably pick up Dark Souls once I move out.

Tell me more of this Lautrec.

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Re: Dark Souls General

Post by LordCuthberton on Mon Mar 05, 2012 9:05 pm

Right. Okay. Sort of half understood that. I feel like the character who see's the distant future apocalypse and has barely any grasp upon it.

QUESTION TIME

1) You suggest a mage class I think. That means I will have 3 bars to manage I guess? (Mana, health and stamina for dodging) is this really recommended for noobs?

2) Dark Souls seems like the game where everything buttfucks you. Why did they include theif classes? Do they even work? If so, why?

3) Would a basic hack/slasher be recommended? Bear in mind that's basically my Elder Scrolls bread and butter. Or is the Pyromancer really that awesome for everything?

4) Is the master key a x1 use item?

5) How will I know what's worth keeping?

6) If lightening rapes everything.....why go for a "pyro"....?

7) Shall I ever trust the writing on the floor?

Cool Exploration? Is it worth attempting?


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Re: Dark Souls General

Post by Xandy on Mon Mar 05, 2012 9:32 pm

LordCuthberton wrote:Right. Okay. Sort of half understood that. I feel like the character who see's the distant future apocalypse and has barely any grasp upon it.

QUESTION TIME

1) You suggest a mage class I think. That means I will have 3 bars to manage I guess? (Mana, health and stamina for dodging) is this really recommended for noobs?

2) Dark Souls seems like the game where everything buttfucks you. Why did they include theif classes? Do they even work? If so, why?

3) Would a basic hack/slasher be recommended? Bear in mind that's basically my Elder Scrolls bread and butter. Or is the Pyromancer really that awesome for everything?

4) Is the master key a x1 use item?

5) How will I know what's worth keeping?

6) If lightening rapes everything.....why go for a "pyro"....?

7) Shall I ever trust the writing on the floor?

Cool Exploration? Is it worth attempting?


1. There are only two stats - health and stamina. You get a set amount of spells that can be recharged by resting at a bonfire and you can get new ones by buying them from other sorcerers/pyromancers.

2. Thief classes are good if you want a good, dodgy dexterity build. They're also good at parrying/backstabs which do a ton of damage.

3. Every character regardless of class will do some hack and slashing. Being a pyromancer just means you start with pyromancy (fire magic). Since you start at level one you can easily make your pyromancer a combat-beast who uses heavy armour and greatswords and shit. Honestly, my pyromancer uncommonly even uses magic despite the fact I'm trying to go for a spellsword build and Intelligence is my highest stat.

4. Unlimited use.

5. You won't unless you check the wikis.

6. Because things that do lightning damage are relatively rare and there's only one faith-based spell (lightning spear and it's upgrades, which you get when you join the Sunbros) that can do it. You'll start encountering lightning more in Anor Londo though, and can even get weapons upgraded there to do lightning damage if they're +10.

7. Most of the time you should. Do not listen to any that tell you to "try jumping" though.

8. If you aren't in human form and don't have 10,000 souls + 15 humanity on you which will vanish if you die horribly, sure. Best to take risks when there is little for you to lose.

Also some other stuff. There's four forms of damage - physical, magic, fire and lightning. There's also three types of spells - Miracles (scales with the Faith stat), Magic (scales with the Intelligence stat) and Pyromancy (scales with the level of your pyromancy glove). For status effects there's - Poison which can slowly fuck you up if you don't have poison-resistant armour (which the Pyromancer's starting armour is) or moss the cure it, Bleeding which can slowly fuck you up if you don't have moss but not as bad as poison, Toxin which is only used by blowgun niggers in Blighttown but is like poison on steroids, and Curse which is used by frogs (and later Seath the Scaleless) and not only instantly kills you but permanently cuts your health in half unless you use a purging stone to remove its effect.


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Re: Dark Souls General

Post by Xandy on Mon Mar 05, 2012 9:39 pm

MilkyFresh wrote:I'll probably pick up Dark Souls once I move out.

Tell me more of this Lautrec.

Spoiler:
"Hey thanks for freeing me. Here, have this useless medallion I stole off some dead sunbro. Oh by the way the firekeeper who kindles your main bonfire is dead. No I don't know how she died, and no I don't know why there's blood all over my shotel and armour. Now if you'll excuse I'mma take the firekeeper's soul and fuck off the game's penultimate area filled with lightning-using gargoyles and dragonslaying knights. See you later!"

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Re: Dark Souls General

Post by MilkyFresh on Mon Mar 05, 2012 9:54 pm

Ah. What a dick.

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Re: Dark Souls General

Post by LordCuthberton on Mon Mar 05, 2012 10:04 pm

Well okay.

I've had a look at wikia's and will probably use the Knight class with masterkey.

Seems like something I can slip into as it won't require detailed analyses when upgrading and will be relatively simple to manage and understand.

Cheers for all the help Xandy. It will arrive either tomorrow or the day after!

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Re: Dark Souls General

Post by Xandy on Mon Mar 05, 2012 10:12 pm

LordCuthberton wrote:I've had a look at wikia's and will probably use the Knight class with masterkey.


Oh lawd...

LordCuthberton wrote:Seems like something I can slip into as it won't require detailed analyses when upgrading and will be relatively simple to manage and understand.

Well, I wouldn't say that...

http://darksoulswiki.wikispaces.com/Upgrades
http://darksoulswiki.wikispaces.com/Stats


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Re: Dark Souls General

Post by LordCuthberton on Mon Mar 05, 2012 10:22 pm

In laymans terms?

ALSO THAT WIKI AND THAT FUCKING TICKING NOISE

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Re: Dark Souls General

Post by Xandy on Mon Mar 05, 2012 11:07 pm

>laymans terms

No. You must read and come to understand it all yourself.

Also, disable the chatbox on the side to stop the noise.

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Re: Dark Souls General

Post by Xandy on Mon Mar 05, 2012 11:25 pm

Also this is easily one of the most unintentionally metal RPGs ever. It includes;

- an intro where Zeus blows up rock dragons with lightning bolts while everything is on fire
- a dead guy made of the corpses of a hundred dead guys
- knights who all look like Sauron
- a dragon that looks like a giant winged vagina with thousands and thousands of teeth
- wielding greatswords and swords larger than you with one hand
- a giant goddess with boobs larger than you are
- a hot naked pyromancer witch whose lower body is a fire-breathing spider demon
- zombie dragons who breath acid
- a batshit crazy knight who flings lightning spears at monsters
- four-armed, snake-headed men who breath lightning
- a huge ass wolf that wields a greatsword with its mouth
- a scaleless dragon who rapes princesses and has CRYSTALS, CRYSTALS EVERYWHERE
- wraith knights in spikey armour who try to steal your soul
- demons made out of titanium and lightning
- FUCKING FIRE EVERYWHERE

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Re: Dark Souls General

Post by Walnutman on Tue Mar 06, 2012 12:36 am

I'm gonna give it a break for a while, got really frustrated when I played it earlier. Fucking ornstein and smough.

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Re: Dark Souls General

Post by Xandy on Tue Mar 06, 2012 12:55 am

That's the same boss I'm stuck at too.

I must admit though, it's pretty damn fun to fight Brostein and Hammerbro with others. First time I fought them I had Solaire and another sunbro using Havel's armour/weapon. As soon as we walked into that room and the battle music started playing, shit got epic fast.

Then Ornstein did his stupid unblockable giant lighting spear impalement.

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Re: Dark Souls General

Post by Walnutman on Tue Mar 06, 2012 12:56 am

I'm using Havel's armour, the problem is I'm too slow attack Smough (I kill Orstein first).

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Re: Dark Souls General

Post by Xandy on Tue Mar 06, 2012 1:06 am

Get dat fukken ring man!

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Re: Dark Souls General

Post by Walnutman on Tue Mar 06, 2012 1:16 am

I got dat fukken ring man!


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Re: Dark Souls General

Post by Xandy on Tue Mar 06, 2012 1:20 am

Get the one that lets you ninja-flip then.

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Re: Dark Souls General

Post by Walnutman on Tue Mar 06, 2012 1:25 am

What is the name of that ring, it sounds sweet.

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Re: Dark Souls General

Post by Xandy on Tue Mar 06, 2012 1:36 am

Dark Wood Grain Ring.

If you're in the Forest Hunter covenant, go to Blightown near the lower wheel thing and you'll find Shiva of the East. He can sell you a bunch of weeaboo weapons like claws and katanas but not the ring.

However, he does have a ninja bodyguard with him. Kill the bodyguard, then pick up the loot that he drops when he dies to get the ring. It will let you ninja flip if you're light enough AND counts armour that's under 50% weight as being 25% weight. This makes it work really well with Havel's Ring.

This will count as a betrayal to the Forest Hunters, but fuck them anyways.

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Re: Dark Souls General

Post by Xandy on Sat Mar 10, 2012 1:46 am

Cuth, u have Dark Souls yet?

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Re: Dark Souls General

Post by LordCuthberton on Sat Mar 10, 2012 9:15 am

I have it, but I also have ME3.

They both arrived yesterday so go figure which one I decided to start first.

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Re: Dark Souls General

Post by Xandy on Sat Mar 10, 2012 4:06 pm

Oh, I should also probably tell you about Covenants. In the games there are factions you can join that give you certain in-game benefits likes spells, cool items or online assistance. There are nine in all, some being easy to stumble across but others being very secretive and hard to find unless you know what you're doing:

Way of the White: Increases chances of meeting other players for co-op. Starting Covenant for Clerics and Knights. The fat cleric dude at the Firelink Shrine can let you join. Easily the worst of the covenants.

Princess Guard: Increases chances of co-op and gives you some special healing miracles. Can be joined after beating Ornstein/Smough and talking to the princess. Only slightly better than Way of the White

Darkmoon Blades. A more secretive Covenant. Lets you invade in the worlds of players who have been invading others and bring justice upon them. Can be joined by getting a ring from the Catacombs and going to Gwyn's tomb in Anor Londo with it equipped. One of the most popular covenants because you can do unlimited PvP, get cool tools and get to go around killing douches.

Warriors of Sunlight: The most bro-tier of the Covenants, so fucking bro their acolytes are called sunbros. Gives you extra benefits for jolly co-operation plus lightning spears. Can be joined by going to the Sunlight Shrine guarded by the Undead Burg dragon, but requires 25 Faith to join (although each time you successfully help someone defeat a boss in co-op, the requirement is knocked down by 5 Faith). Very popular because PRAAAAISE THE SUUUUN!

Forest Hunters: Covenant that has players invade the worlds of any human players who enter Darkroot Garden. Give you a few toys and let you buy weeaboo weapons from Shiva. Can be joined by talking to the giant cat in Darkroot Garden. Overall a pretty lame PvP Covenant indented to be for players who are too low level to reach the Darkmoon Blades or Darkwraiths. Most of the time you will thrown at multiple players higher level than you and get your ass kicked hard.

Chaos Covenant: Covenant that gives no online benefits, but instead some cool spells and a shortcut to one of the final areas of the game. Can be joined by talking to Quelaag's sister behind the illusion wall in the second bell chamber. All players should join this covenant at least once, just so they can get the Great Chaos Fireball she gives upon initiation.

Gravelord Servant: A Covenant that lets you place curses on the worlds of three different players and allow them to invade you. Can be joined by entering a specific coffin in the Catacombs, which will cause you to be dragged off to Gravelord Nito's chambers. Very broken the online mechanic just doesn't work right now. Most people just join it for the cool initiation sword/miracle.

Secret Covenant with spoilers in its name alone: This Covenant lets you challenge others players who have a certain item to a battle, gaining the item if you win. You can then use said item to gain some awesome power boosts and upgrade high-level weapons. Can be joined by going to the very end of Ash Lake at the bottom of the world, which can be reached by going down the Great Hollow connected to Blighttown. Overall a very cool Covenant with good bonuses, although rather hard to reach.

Darkwraiths: The ultimate PvP Covenant. Allows you to invade the worlds of other, lower-level players as often as you please so you can steal their humanity. You also get plenty of cool toys. A bit tricky to join as you must A) Not join the Princess Guard ever, B) Not have reached +2 rank with the Chaos Covenant and C) Gotten through New Londo and defeated the bosses of the Abyss BEFORE talking to Frampt after getting the Lordvessel. One of the most popular high-level covenants due to all the PvP it allows for.

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Re: Dark Souls General

Post by Xandy on Mon Mar 12, 2012 5:59 pm

Fucking Seath the Scaleless man...

>find out you can get an awesome sword if you cut off his tail
>decide to try and get it
>the bastard keep rotating if I get near, and does an extremely high-damage tail slam if I hit his tail a little
>try to get his tail eight times, get killed eight times
>decide to give up the tail and just kill the fucker
>hit him ten times with lightning spear and FLAWLESS VICTORY
>Seath dies like a bitch and I get 60,000 souls


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Re: Dark Souls General

Post by Desert Warrior on Tue Mar 13, 2012 7:05 am

I still remember when I first played Dark Souls and how it scared the ever living shit out of me.
SINCE WHEN CAN BOSSES DESTROY THE SCENERY AROUND THEM, FUCKING PILLARS YOU WERE MEANT TO BE A BASTION OF SAFETY.
That was pretty much my reaction, but overall it's a damn good game.

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Re: Dark Souls General

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